This time there were 11 of us on the team giving the weekend. This time we had 36 guys in attendance. We spent weeks meeting and preparing what would be said and done. We cater to the needs of those attending so they lack nothing and are treated like the important men they are. We prayed for the men from the time they sign up all the way through the end of weekend. There are men and women not on the weekend that devote themselves in prayer for the men also.
There is a great deal of time and effort put into these retreats. We are often tired and worn out by the time the weekend comes becasue of the hundreds of details that need to be addressed. Even more, we are exhausted by the time it is over. We give of our time and resources to men we may know and others we had just met. We welcome them all with excitement and are truly happy they came. There is very little we would not do for these men and we do all that we can so they have a memorable time.
There also is a kitchen team. That group shops for all the food, prepares meals, and cleans up after the meals. They are there very early in the morning to have coffee and snacks ready before breakfast is served and they stay late at night making sure plenty of snack food is available once mealtimes are over.
It is a huge and complex effort all being orchestrated for an ordinary group of men from all walks of life. I think that is amazing and noteworthy. The team gives so much and the men coming give up a great deal of their time because they share a common interest, wanting to be better people. What seems obvious is that 47 men with a common interest can come together and have an amazing weekend together simply because they share that interest.
We picked a date and 47 men showed up for who knows what. We set aside careers, bragging about house size, what cars we drive, how much money we make, what clothes we wear and all the things that we measure ourselves and each other by. We came together with sleeping bags and comfy clothing; men just being men. We were all equal, say doesn't it say somewhere we were all created equal? Hmm, I may have read that someplace! There were no invisible lines, anyone could eat at anyone's lunch table, there was no executive dining room or washrooms. We were equal. We were all accepted by one another. No one was being judged or shunned. At the start of the weekend things are a little awkward, then friendships being to develop, then any guardedness falls away. You can see a spark of care and love for one another begin to burn and watch it grow into an easy love and care for one another. Men without all the junk of life that keeps us alone and seperated. Men, who, all be it for a day and a half, drop their guards and not rank themselves among other men based on what they do or have. We truly never think of ourselves as any better than any other man.
It seems to me that if all the stuff we strive for keeps us from really being who we are, then why do we think that stuff is so precious? Why do we give our lives away chasing after it? Why do we go deep into debt thinking we own what we will never truly own. At best we can only use these things for a while, ownership is mythical. How can I say that? Easy, we obtain stuff, use it, die, and leave it all behind. How is that owning anything? Sometimes we are just slaves to that stuff. We work hard to take care of it. I wonder how many boat or motorcycle owners work saturdays to own these things but the extra work keeps them from using and enjoying them. Hey, I was there once so I get it.
Maybe you see what I see. Stuff gets in the way of a fuller, richer life of being connected to other people who want the same thing. How many of us sense the emptiness of houses full of stuff but empty of laughter, friends, joy, and love? If we see that, if we yearn for a richer life, then is it not madness to spend a huge amount of our time and resources chasing after stuff we really don't want? How insane is it for us to not work towards what we desire as human beings and instead work toward things that care nothing about us? How can we love the stuff we love when it will never be capable of loving us back? I really enjoy my little Saab convertible but does it rank above people around me? No. I do hug it once in a while and tell it how special it is (ha) but it never hugs me back!
I know I have attempted to get together with people I enjoy, even family, but sadly they respond with, "Sorry, we're too busy" or "I just don't have time." Isn't that sad? I guess there is a chance we are boring and people are just avoiding us. Unlikely, but possible! Ha!
Is that all that is missing in every day life? Do we keep our distance from others because we just care more about stuff than people? Could it be that simple? Is finding that thing we can have in common the key to us all getting along and caring for each other? Is finding others that treasure people above stuff that difficult?
Isn't there something that can be done to bring us ALL together where we can love and care for one another? I think so and the men's weekend is a great example. We all came together without bags and bags of stuff or props or possessions to prove we were what we wanted others to think we were. We came just as we were. Baggy jeans or sweats, loose comfortable t-shirts, slippers or tennis shoes or loafers. No designer wear, no fancy watches or cell phones, we took them away and locked them up until the weekend was over. If anyone came sporting a Rolex, no one knew it! We came as men wanting to be better men. We came as men wanting to be with men who wanted more out of life. And we got it. In some cases we came as strangers and went away as friends. In other cases, we came as acquaintances but left as friends. In still other cases, we came as friends but left as better friends. We came as good people and left as better people and it is good. I have been on a men's weekend team 14 times now and I have met some amazing men. I have also been blessed with more and more true friends.
Maybe all we need to do to have a richer and fuller life is just set aside the stuff. Just don't be judgmental or prejudiced. Simply accept one another for who they are and what they are. Even the government agrees that all men are created equal. I don't often like to quote the government but..
It was recognized way back on July 4, 1776;
"We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness." -The Declaration of Independence
Maybe we just forget? Does a bigger home make anyone better? I don't think so. Does a fancier car make one person better than another? I doubt it. Does not having a key to the executive washroom make me less of a man? Nah.
Perhaps we can simply set aside all this nonsense pushed on us by marketing companies. Companies and ads that tell us if we use this or drive that, we will be elevated to a higher status. That's silly! Their job is to make the companies that employ them more and more money. Their job is to get us to buy stuff with no interest in making us better people.
Who we are inside is what matters not what is in our garage or closet. How we treat people is what matters not what our house looks like. Choose to live loving. Choose to be kind. Choose to be a positive influence in a world filled with hate. Choose to be the best you possible. Leave an impression on the world and in others lives, just choose to make it a good impression. Forget the stuff - remember to love!