I have been around a fairly long time and who me is has changed over and over again. In fact, if I am honest, I have spent far more time thinking about me than anyone else. I have thought about what I want to be when I grow up, how I look, and what I like or don't like. Over time, I have spent countless hours thinking about where I want to go and what I want to do. I have worried about my aches and pains, finances and even if people like me or not. (I know that I am probably the only person who wonders about that once in a while.) At times, I have been consumed by caring for homes, cars and yards.
I have lived approximately 23,073 days or 553,752 hours or 33,225,120 minutes. I have slept around 184,584 of those hours leaving me 369,168 hours to do with as I choose. That equates to 22,150,080 minutes that I could have wisely crafted into making my dreams come true. Sadly not all those days, hours and minutes were wisely budgeted placing them in proper categories to deliver me the life I had wanted. I believe I spent much of my time in caring for my fitness, working, and for family and friends. I also, sadly, feel a little voice in the back of my mind telling me I have spent the major portion of my time thinking all about me, my wants, needs, and desires. We talk of budgeting things that have value like our finances. Isn't our time just as valuable? Have we ever thought of budgeting our time?
If we consider the concept of time budgeting, it would permit us to categorize how we dispense our time, making sure each category we find important gets it's fair share. So we have 24 hours a day. We spend 8 at work, an hour drive time, and 8 hours sleeping. That is 17 hours, leaving us 7 hours to do with as we please. If we choose, we have 7 hours each day to spend thinking about "me."
We spend most of our lives focused on oursleves. Sure, we all care for others and do good deeds here and there or now and then. But how much of our time on this planet do we spend being aware of what is going on around us? How aware are we of the needs of those close to us? Don't most of us get so self focused we don't have the time to check in on a friend or family member who is struggling in some way? Do we set aside time to see if we can help another person solve a problem or fix an issue they are dealing with? So what have we done with those discretionary 9,657,900 (in my case) minutes?
Sometimes people really could use a kind helping hand to help them stand strong in tough times. I heard a teaching about the fact that when most people are asked how they are doing, they reply, fine. Why do we respond that way when so many of us are not fine?
I took that thought to heart vowing to not respond with "fine" the next time I was having difficulty. Sure enough I got into situation with a surgery and my health care not getting paid by my employer. I got hit with $18,000 in medical bills for a pre qualified surgery. I had no idea what to do and how to proceed. At church one Sunday, following the service we all headed to the back for coffee and cookies. I must have heard, "Hey, how are you doing?" said a thousand times. I also must have heard, "Fine" the same number of times.
However, one time, when I was asked how I was doing, I responded with, "Actually not very well" and I briefly explained the situation. I was getting responses like, "Too bad" or "sorry" or other similar words. The funny thing was the next few words were something like, "Okay, well gotta go, have a nice day". Most people almost seemed anxious to end the conversation and move on. Nice day? I wasn't going to have a nice day, or a nice week.
I am thinking, as I am sure you are thinking, what did I expect anyone to do? I guess I knew there was not much anyone could "do" unless they were an attorney or were on a mission of giving away thousands of dollars. I guess deep inside, I simply wanted someone to care. If someone would just seem to care, then that would give me some sense of value during a time when I felt I had none.
Can't we all relate to that? Can't we all think of times that we just wanted someone to care? We know that in such situations, there is little anyone can do, and that is fine. However, I also believe that in such times, we can all care.
I am certainly not pointing the finger because I have missed opportunities to care also. The truth is that we get so focused on "me" that we miss seeing others around us who are struggling or suffering or in pain. We miss the opportunity to care.
I remember a time that I was out of a job. I kept a stack of resumes in the car and gave one to every person I could think of. I asked them to keep me in mind at their work or if anyone else happened to mention an opportunity. I begged and pleaded. It got almost embarassing. If I had been holding little boxes rather than resumes, you might think I was aggressively selling cookies.
I let go of my pride hoping for any kind of job doing almost anything. I handed out around 50 resumes. Of those 50, one friend took me to his work and introduced me to his boss. Nothing came from that other than the fact that that person "cared" enough to make an effort. While it seemed the entire world thought I had nothing of value, this one person did. His caring made a difference and that day was a good day.
You know, after sharing my financial decline with some, they called and asked me to go to dinner, or some such thing. I could not go out to dinner. It was certainly not something I could afford at the time. It was like some people didn't even hear what I had to say. Where did they miss the part that I was broke and had to sell my second car?
We have 7 hours a day that are pretty flexible. We have some of those hours during which we can do with whatever we want. Can we budget some of them for caring? Can we take our habitual focus off ourselves and give someone who is struggling a call? Can we take some time and really listen to see if there is any way someone we know could use our help? Have we become so conditioned to hearing of tough times that such things go in one ear and out the other? We may have, until tough times happen to us.
We show our love for God by loving those around us, so how are we really doing at that? Sometimes, some of us just need a little lift by feeling like we matter or that someone cares. I wonder, if we search deep inside, don't most of us feel the same way?
James 2:14-16 NLT; What good is it, dear brothers and sisters, if you say you have faith but don't show it by your actions? Can that kind of faith save anyone? Suppose you see a brother or sister who has no food or clothing, and you say, "Good-bye and have a good day; stay warm and eat well- but then you don't give that person any food or clothing. What good does that do?
Love one another and care for one another for this is well and good.