That rude person checking out in your line. The person riding the back bumper of your car shaking his/her fist at you. The person at work that seems to always take credit for your work and ideas. The person who could easily help you find what you are looking for but is too busy laughing and talking to a co-worker. Then there’s that client who continually cancels his appointment at the last minute.
Those are minor annoyances but what about the husband/wife who runs off and leaves you to raise the kids alone? How about the person who kills someone close to you during a robbery? How about the friend who turns on you and sets out to ruin your reputation online? How about the boss who continually dumps all the junk work on you then criticizes you for never doing anything important?
How do we deal with such situations and people in our lives? Surely, they deserve the worst we can dream up! Surely, we deserve to get even in some way. Surely, when we are wronged, things need to be made right. Sometimes wouldn’t you just love to bust that difficult person right in the chops?
Sometimes, not often enough, Jesus comes to mind when I start feeling similar things. I am reminded of Him being falsely accused. I am reminded of Him being publicly mocked, slapped and humiliated. I can picture Him lying on His back on the cross while they pound nails into His body.
As I read the accounts of Jesus' trial and execution, I notice He has very little to say. He didn’t argue, threaten, or fight back. He didn’t scream “unfair." He didn’t attempt to retaliate or show how those who were doing things so wrong were wrong. He said nothing. He was wronged in much larger ways than we will ever be wronged. They schemed to destroy Him. They lied about Him. They called Him names. They chose a murdering revolutionist over Him. All He ever did was love them, heal them, teach them and offer them eternity. Some person didn’t just drive over His kid's Barbie doll collection, they nailed Him to a cross to die.
Jesus hung on the cross gasping for breath at the hands of those He came to help. Those closest to Him deserted Him when times got desperate. Yet He willingly stayed on that cross until He breathed His last breath.
Oh, yes, just before He took His last breath, He asked God, the Father to forgive those who did all that to Him. That is our example of how to deal with difficult people. That is our example of what to say about those who harm us. We have a choice. We can get even, hurt back, hate, stomp our feet, or talk behind another's back. Probably not a plan God would endorse.
Or, we can choose to forgive. We can choose to pray to our Father that He forgive them for the wrong they had done to us. We can ask the Father to change them, bless them, help them to be a better person. Most likely a plan God Himself would endorse. Difficult to do? Yes.
Why should we? Well, first, because it is the right thing to do. Second, because our Lord told us to forgive and third because we have been forgiven.
Yes, when Jesus considered those who had done all those horrible things to Him, He said (in Luke 23:34) “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they are doing.”
That is our example. That is our instruction on how to handle those who hurt us. That is how we deal with difficult people. Difficult to do? Yes.
We have hurt others. We have turned our back on Jesus. We have sinned over and over and sometimes are so arrogant we never even bother to ask to be forgiven. We just keep on skipping through life hurting those around us, getting even, and even hurting the Lord.
When He died to bring forgiveness to those who hurt Him, He also died to bring forgiveness for each and every one of us who believes in Him as Savior. Each of us has sinned hundreds, thousands, even hundreds of thousands of times in our lifetime yet He forgives us.
With that in mind, how hard should it be for us to forgive that one person who has wronged us? How hard is it for us to reach out to that family member who we have not talked to for 12 years to offer a renewed relationship through forgiveness? On the other hand, if you have hurt someone else now may just be the time to apologize and ask for forgiveness.
Haven't we enjoyed punishing that other person long enough now that we can forgive? Today is that day! We are face to face with Jesus' example and we can just as well forgive as we have been forgiven. Don’t wait for the clock is ticking and there will be a time when time may run out for any one of us. Love by forgiving. Forgive by loving. Jesus forgiveness for us came through His death but was driven by His love. Let the love we have received from Him motivate us to forgive. Replace that unforgiveness with love. Don't live with anger and hatred until just before your very last breath. Do something about it now and live with a refreshed and renewed spirit. Love one another.